Friday, January 23, 2009

Finding Your Feet Again

So I lost myself. It's been awhile that I've been gone. But yesterday, I felt like I found myself again. Or really myself was given back to me. I hope I stick around for awhile. But it's been a year of coming and going. It's great to feel alive again. The same things are all around you, but you can actually feel them this time...the act of breathing, the crisp cold air, the beauty of nature, the delight of infectious laughter, the sweet sound of music, the excitement of life, the joy of kids, the camaraderie of friends, the love of family, the goodness of the Lord. Even when I don't feel them, I know they're still there, I just can't see them. Other people have to see them for me. Remind me they're still there. I just heard this song by Rosie Thomas on Pandora. It seems to depict some of the things I felt and all of us feel at some time.

Death Came And Got Me

I can't, I can't stop crying.
Everyday I’m so afraid
Afraid of dying
Death already came and got me
Cause I’m not living...
I'm not living anyway...

And who am I supposed to be?
Everybody seems to see except for me
Who cares anyway....
Cause when it's over,
It's all over, and what you gain you throw away

When will love ever find me?
All my life all I’ve craved is to be seen
Who cares anyway...
Cause when it's over,
All that matters is the love you gave away